I decided it was time to celebrate National Bird Day. I went down to the pet store and bought me a Parakeet. I named him Tweety. Tweety was so yellow and cute. I just had to cuddle him. He left the tastiest of white juice leek down my arm which I happily licked up. Then I decided to give him a snack. Now, I didn't have any bird food. So, I decided to feed him corn. I squated over to allow the bird to peck inside my gaping poo hole. He wouldn't do it, so I just shoved his head and body up there. He squirmed around pecking for a while. It tickled. Then I felt the gassiest bubble and pain build up. I couldn't help it, I had to fart! I let out a huge *bleep* fart and poor Tweety torpedos accross the room, going splat against the wall. Poor thing, didn't even live an hour.

OMG !!!!!!! U areeee sooooo weirddddd omgi cant believe u are human !!! Are u a female dog ??? Cause u act like a real *bleep* !! U slutt how come u put that birds bodyy into ur poo hole ??? Are u insaneee poorrr tweettyy godd get a lifee i bet u are a no work person and the only thing u have to do is talk *bleep* ( literally ;) ) so make a favor to the world and st torturing animals and getting thrm inside ur *bleep* !!!! Seriuosly are u that alone that the only sex u have is with pets !!! Godd dont get a job get a LIFE !!!!!:D

It is my birthday. Well it was when this was posted (the blog)

I did that with my hamster! I wuld love to buy more hamsters to do that again! I luv u!

You are so disgusting...you should go ahead and kill yourself. Your welcome :)